How is your relationship?

I know it's supposed to be the happiest time of your life, the relationship is supposed to be solidified and get even better.

Mine sucks. My supposed fiance has turned into a bitch. We used to be happy. Now it's I give, and she takes, not acknowldedging a single thing.

We were supposed to get a place together and then some shit started happening. Now I said I'm getting my own place (staying where I am, even though my roommate is moving out)...

So, not only is this taking a shitty emotional toll on me, it's now become a crappy financial one too. Before rent was $260 a month, and the bills were split down the middle. Now rent will be $375 and I'll pay full price for the bills (no, they won't really go down because my roommate is rarely ever here).

I'm so close to just loading up the new SUV with her shit and leaving it on her doorstep.

Advice?

__________________________________
-Ryan

Dont get married, it will not change after you get married it will only get worse, and kids god love em to death especially mine but once you have one your life totally changes and it all starts in the bedroom. Ive actually contemplated cheating before. yes its that bad but thank god for my 2gnt lol:shrug

98 RS: Mods: Custom Stage 2 Turbo kit , 55mm throttle body, gutted cat, evo cat back exhaust, p/p intake manifold,p/p Head, af-x underdrive pulley, B&M short throw shifter,Built bottom end Je pistons eagle rods 8.8:1 compression.





Status:Up and running again! nice new paint

Custom stage 2 hahn turbo kit
Hahn Super 16g turbo (ceramic coated)
Hahn manifold (ceramic coated)
Hahn Downpipe assembly
Hahn intercooler piping smic
Hahn oil line kit
Type s bov
2G Gsx smic
walbro 255 fuel pump
Synapse missing link
Vortech s-fmu
NGK Bkr7e11 Plugs
A-pillar w/boost, a/f, oil pressure gauges


New Addition: 2007 Eclipse GT 6 speed

__________________________________
-Ryan

.........................................................................................................................

Built. That's All...
.........................................................................................................................
www.monkeybuttpirate.com
.........................................................................................................................
2 Fingers of Scotch with a milk back... Stat!

__________________________________
-Ryan

.........................................................................................................................

Built. That's All...
.........................................................................................................................
www.monkeybuttpirate.com
.........................................................................................................................
2 Fingers of Scotch with a milk back... Stat!

my ex cheated on me when we were engaged. I got full price for the ring back, and she cant return the dress, haha. Thats life. If you're unsure of it, walk away.

btw $375 is either a steal, or you slob the knob for cheaper prices.

im looking at one for $975 lol

__________________________________
-Ryan

Dude, if your not happy now then stop and wait. We all go through bad times, this might just be one but it could be something worse.

Just stop in your tracks and see where things go. you dont have to move any faster than you feel comfortable with. When you move in with someone things will be hard at first guarenteed, its not easy to change how you live especially when you now live with a female. Trust me, it will stretch your patience until they break.

I know you are not living together yet but just keep what i said in mind if you move in together. Since you had a roomate it wont be as hard for you as it was for me.

"Never chase busses or women, you'll always get left behind"

Terry

yeah i know what you feel like. I was in a relationship not too long ago where everything started off perfect and then started to get worse. She started to get very "mean" and cranky all the time. Started nit-picking everything. Felt like I was walking on eggshells with her when at first it was so cool and laid back. Not a week would go by where we didnt get into fights (non-physical of course).

Well long story short... we arent together anymore.

I wouldnt put up with someone that treats you that way.

--- My 2gnt WIKI contribution ---> http://www.jamlez.com/2gnt

97 Eclipse Spyder

Why do women turn into complete and utter bitches when they are unhappy in a relationship?

When the man wants out of a relationship he distances himself far away from his woman.

___________________________________
97 Talon-SOLD
95 GS-T-SOLD
08 F-150

I was talking to my neighbor for a good few hours about all of this shit. My neighbor is a girl who is cooler than hell, and she knows my fiance, and pretty much said the stuff I was thinking...

I'm thinking I'll break it off after I return from the cruise. The only reason I'm doing that is because the Bearded Dragon needs to be fed every day, and I don't trust my roommate to do it, the soon to be former fiance will do it. That and I don't want to deal with this stress before I leave.

The one problem is the dragon. Both of us split the cost, $ 80... I had the tank ($20), the light and the fixture (total $25), and the loft/hammock ($10). I paid for all of the crickets so far (in a month $50). She bought trays ($12). I'm thinking I should either keep it for free for what I've put into it with crickets, or give him to her for $75. But I love that dragon and frankly put, it's not a starter lizard, I don't think she has the reptile "know-how" to keep it alive.

I think I'm going to just sit on it, like Terry said, and think about it over the cruise. Hopefully I'll make the right decision.

__________________________________
-Ryan

I'd take a step back and take a look at the over-all picture. You're lucky she didn't wait until after the wedding to let her true colors show like mine did. Now I'm fucked.
I definetly don't feel bad for you about your bills though. My rent is $550, car payment is $567, cable, phone and electric total about $200. Plus oil needs to be filled a few times a year at $450 a whack. Credit cards, loan, ect, ect... I'm looking at swinging $1600-1800/month on my own if we split. I'm still very tempted though. Fuck it, I want to be single again.

__________________________________________________________
-Tony <--- NOT asian.
'06 Wicked White EVO IX

How long have you been together?

I ask because a lot of my friends (including myself) went through 'hard' times around the 3 year mark. Coincidence? Perhaps, but maybe there's truth to the idea too. Lots of personal-life changes tend to effect women a bit more than men and like joeck mentioned, the sex life isn't exactly new anymore.

In the end it's your call. Do what's best for you and remember people don't drastically change (usually).

If I were you, I'd keep the dragon and get rid of the girl. You're in college and have plenty of other things to worry about. I've been there.

I was 21, been dating the same chick for almost 3 years, but she turned into a real bitch. I had bought her a ring (not a diamond one, but expensive for my college budget none the less), and believe it or not, but I had a bearded dragon at the time too, but she was 100% mine.

Think of it this way, are you willing to put up with this girl for the rest of your life? No, I wouldn't. Around Spring Break of 2001, I had some friends come in from out of state to hang out, but my girl told me I couldn't go out with them. See, we were all 21+, but she still had some months to go.

I finally decided I was done and told her that. She flipped, talked shit, showed up at my house, tried to push me down some stairs, you know, the typical crazy X stuff.

It's not worth it. If worst comes to worst, could you trust your neighbor to feed your dragon? Get some meal worms, they're easier to handle during feeding, and you can just drop them right in front of the dragon and it will chomp them up.

Like everyone's said, take a step back, look over the big picture and ask yourself if you're willing to deal with her for the rest of your life. Take your time, nothing has to be done right now.

I got rid of the girl, had years of fun finishing school, moving to a new city, doing what I wanted, and accidentally ran across the girl I'm engaged to now and couldn't be happier. Well, if my rent was less than $400, ha! My house payment alone is $1130/mo.

Enjoy your cruise!

~Luke
Facebook
1969 Cougar - 11.91 - 380HP
2007 GSXR 750
1999 OZ - SOLD - 15.26 NA - 14.71 on 75 shot

Women are worthless. You have your whole life to me miserable and married so enjoy your youth IMO. I'm 24 and have a couple friends getting married, or they are already married and their social life sucks. Especially when you have kids to. Most couples are pretty annoying IMO. When I have a gf I still spend a lot of time w/ friends but it seems that most of the couples I know are joined at the hip. Such a waste considering most relationships don't last at such a young age. ALSO, when you have kids you can never get away and you always have to worry about getting people to watch the kid(s). I'm sure plenty of you married members are happy but most couples don't seem happy. So many co-workers complain about their marriages all the time and a lot of them have been divorced before. F that. The only girl I need to be attached to will be a sexy girl named Porsche.

2009 Corolla S - waiting until 2012 for my next toy!
*SOLD* 1992 3000GT VR4 - pearl white and 45,6xx miles!
*SOLD* 2007 Subaru Legacy GT sedan
*SOLD* 95 Mitsubishi 3000GT VR4 - BPU
*SOLD* 97 Eclipse GS Star Stage 2

I'm sorry to hear your having problems with your fiance. I don't know why women change so much once a guy pops the question. I have heard of cases where couples have lived together for 5 or 6 years and once they decide to get married everything falls apart.

I would advise you to give it a little bit of time to see if things improve but if you see things get worse just call it quits. You don't wanna get married and maybe ending up having kids to then decide that she was the wrong girl for you. It will be hard at first if you break up but when you meet the right woman, who treats you the way you deserve to be treated, you will be happy you waited.

meh. I'm engaged and have had zero problems in the last year. No bitchiness, just the usual monthly swings and I'm happy.

But then again this girl is different. Smart, likes cars, loves to just 'chill'. Helps me work on my car all the time. We go there and she'll be cleaning it out for me, then pops the hood to check oil lol She can change a tire and plumb my intercooler piping. lol She's pretty useful compared to the average 'I'm not getting my hands dirty, prissy type'

I'm Very Happy to say the least and I can't even wait to get married. I stay here and run my business, she goes to med school. Buy A castle. Live happily ever after.

Thats how it goes in my head but, life has a funny way of fucking things up.

I eat emo kids for breakfast

1995 Eagle Talon (SOLD)
72' SuperBeetle
72' Standard Beetle
56' Deluxe Beetle

me and my wife have been together for about 5 years, and been married since sept. of this past year, now, what i will say is we have 3 kids and its seems liek the relation ship started to change form kid 1.......

PEOPLE STOP GETTING ENGAGED/MARRIED SO QUICKLY (alteast while your still so immature (yes I know your over 21 or so, your still immature)).

you dont even know your significant other well enough to spend the rest of your life with them. People dont just instantly change once you put a ring on their fingers, communicate and find out what is the problem

AND Don't get married if you can't even stand the first little problem or even afford to pay 375 bucks of rent or a simple 45 bucks for gas. Money/lack there of can be a huge problem in marriages. Wait till you can buy a house, afford a car/support the other if they loose their job,etc... Communication is also the most important thing.

Man up, communicate, communicate,communicate. Shit for all you know she found out she is pregnant or has personal health issues thats why she isn't being the nicest of people lately. maybe she is not sure now because she can see that you can barely take care of a lizard. Maybe she is feeling left out/ignored,etc..
Just the fact that you had to go to your neighbor to talk about your life with your fiance should tell you something...COMMUNICATE with your fiance not your fucking neighbors.
Sounds like your the problem
If you can't hack the first time it gets hard you don't need to be getting engaged at all because it WILL end in divorce.

Sorry to be so negative but my life/wife is great, Im sick of seeing posts about people that get engaged too fast and then want to get out.

I waited to ask my wife until she had finished college and I was able to purchase our house. And I told here that long before I asked her to be mine. It was understood because we communicated and are best friends. If you cant communicate and arent best friends with your girlfriend DONT ask them to marry you in the first place.

1998 dodge avenger 4 cyl AT
Mods are:
Not enough

Been there and it was fine. The age factor plays a big part, as does the financial factor. In the end, the age difference got me, but I'm cool with it, since I'm so much better off now.

In a marriage, times will get tough when you least expect it and you both have to be able to communicate your feelings/needs/wants openly. If you have come into problems at this stage and can not communicate, then it's not going to work.

I say, make an attempt to talk to her. Don't be accusational. Don't be sarcastic. Don't rasie your voice and try to talk over her. Karma is a beautiful woman - not a bitch. If you try to talk to her about things, keeping a calm, respectful tone/posture, and she flips out on you or doesn't, otherwise, match your posturing, then it's time to cut your losses and get out.

I can understand an attachement to a pet, but if the pet is that important to you, don't risk its life over less than $100 dollars. Take the animal and pay her for it, if that's what it takes. It's easier to deal with the loss of the money than the pet.

If it's just you and you're in school, consider moving either into a dorm or closer to campus. Contact the student services office to see if they can suggest a room mate locator service you could try.

Put the Blazer in storage and get that DSM back out on the road. If your parents will allow it, try to sell the Jimmy and further save money by not having to pay storage on any vehicle.

I only *wish* I had a $375 rent payment. Mine is $450 and I'm splitting a house three ways with utilities.

*edit*
all gone, ima jackass

*edit*
gone...

thank you driggs..if anyone can take care of things like that with finess its either you or dino.

as far as i can tell..it seems like its over. best to just move on. go have fun on the cruize. use your head..not your heart. your heart will only drag you through more needless shit. take it from a guy who knows. when its over its over and its time to get out.

-----------------------------------------
2011 Nissan Xterra Pro-4x

2007 Kawasaki Ninja 650R

1996 Mitsubishi Eclipse RS-NX 75 shot, AEM CAI, P&P t/b and intake mani-SOLD

1964 Buick Electra 225-all original, all power options, 325hp, 445ft/lbs tq

oh so now its all about who speaks better english?
not even my first language so i could care less..
50 cent is gay.. u and ur music r probably gayer anyways..
18" chromes...
its a 97 GS.. most likely better looking than urs.
last posts are gone just like u wanted... ur right i shouldnt have posted my stupid shit here...
ur still ugly btw
bye.

im not from the US.. Canada. only been here for 3 years which means ive only been speaking english for 3 years. i actually speak better than i can type and lots of ppl say im doing more than fine for a person who's been here for a couple of years only.. everyone makes typos, no one's perfect.
yes, im sure my car is way sexier than urs. and im not even close to done with it. im dumping over 12k right into interior/exterior this summer.. yes its slow but i got 3k worth of turbo parts right next to me waiting to be installed (waiting for my star front mount)
and wrong, my dad can beat up ur dad
lol yes and i was gona call u fat but thats old news, im sure everyone already knows
other than that i have nothing against u.. and just to let u know i plan on quitting weed and smokes very soon. hope that makes u feel better lol

All I have to say is listen to any advice from Driggs...

I've been on here for a little over 3 years I think, and though I dont post much, I read pretty much everything. That man has made it through more shit than anyone I know, and look at him. Definitely a very strong man in many ways. One smart, classy guy IMO.

_________________________________________________
2005 GTO - 10.88 @ 127.94
2004 Flame Red SRT-4 - Stock turbo : 12.5 @ 110 -Traded 7/16/08
1995 Eclipse GS - Project Return to Daily Driver has begun!

1998 dodge avenger 4 cyl AT
Mods are:
Not enough

1991 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX - SOLD
2006 Mustang GT Convertible

Originally posted by mcgyvr

Originally posted by 95 Mitsu All I have to say is listen to any advice from Driggs... I've been on here for a little over 3 years I think, and though I dont post much, I read pretty much everything. That man has made it through more shit than anyone I know, and look at him. Definitely a very strong man in many ways. One smart, classy guy IMO.

Geesh.. do you suck on his dick too when he is sad 95 mitsu and driggs sitting in a tree ..k-i-s-s-i-n-g

_________________________________________________
2005 GTO - 10.88 @ 127.94
2004 Flame Red SRT-4 - Stock turbo : 12.5 @ 110 -Traded 7/16/08
1995 Eclipse GS - Project Return to Daily Driver has begun!

If the Dragon becomes an issue during this, give him to me a for a while. You can have him back when its over and it will give me change of pets for a while.

Terry

I was engaged for nearly 3 years to a girl I had known for 7. It was great at first, but she turned into a bitch and actually left herself (which was fine, because I had her pay her half of things for the duration of the lease or I threatened I would sue).

It sucked, but I'm better for it. My current relationship has been on for ten months nearly, and I'm taking things incredibly slow...and it's a lot better that way. If it sucks, get out. Don't let things get more involved.

-Corey

Mariko and I fight over money more than anything else in the relationship. If you can't figure out how to deal with $200 worth of Dragon shit than you are doomed.

------------------------------------------------
98 ESi
95 GS

money fights are one of the main reasons people get divorced. kinda sad really.

___________________________________________

Get out imo. Girls (especially immature ones) have this phase they go through where basically they assume they've "caught" you and they can do whatever they want at your expense. Guys do this too, so take a look at what you're doing in retaliation/reaction/regret.

I say get out rather than working it out, because it sounds like she's worse than usual. If you are sure it's just a phase or you're giving her all the blame, you might want to try counseling. It took about $1400 of therapy this year alone, but because my girl and I both independantly showed up at every appointment, I felt like we were both comitted to fixing our problems. If she doesn't care, she won't show.

Bottom line, there's nobody in the world who can make you happy, you gotta do that yourself. If you're not happy on your own, doing your own thing, then realistically you won't be happy just because you've added another person (or 3) to your life.

I don't understand why everyone's in such a rush to get married, and especially to have kids, but I see NO reason to rush into it. We're not even engaged and we've been living together for 6 years.

i pretty much agree with everything ^^ said, except for the "phases" thing. to me, they are just an excuse. "oh, well im just going through a phase right now..." yeah..thats exactly what i heard from my ex-fiance when she decided to let her "friends" of a whopping 3 months talk her into the drunk sluty lifestyle. make no mistake, that was her own fault. and yes..it sure was a phase, and its over now that she has a controling and abusive boyfriend who flips out if she talks to ANYONE. but ya know what..a phase shouldent be used as an excuse or amnesty. she is doing what she is doing for one reason or another. its not like shes posessed. she is still fully making her own decisions (stupid as they may be) and she should still be held accountable.

"phases" can go on for days, months, years with no indications of beginning or ending. furthmore, "just waiting till they are out of the phase" solves little. 1, because they still did whatever they did to hurt you or wreck things...no matter the excuse. and 2, things will NEVER be the same afterwards. the actions during this time (which also may never cease) have to come from somewhere.

and yes, i know SEVERAL couples that have splt over money.

and me personally, i have always been known to be a bit fast, but here latley, im living for myself and i could honestly care less about having someone right now. i have my life and my stuff to get in order. and yes, if your not happy with yourself and your life alone, no other person can make your life complete. if your not a man before..no woman can MAKE you a man...no matter how many times society would have you belive that.

-----------------------------------------
2011 Nissan Xterra Pro-4x

2007 Kawasaki Ninja 650R

1996 Mitsubishi Eclipse RS-NX 75 shot, AEM CAI, P&P t/b and intake mani-SOLD

1964 Buick Electra 225-all original, all power options, 325hp, 445ft/lbs tq

--- My 2gnt WIKI contribution ---> http://www.jamlez.com/2gnt

97 Eclipse Spyder

it's funny how I can relate to much of what everyone is saying, as I've been in many of those same situations (at some point in my life)

Can't say I have much to add here, as what Dan said is pretty much my stance on relationships. Heaven and happiness come from within us - if you are searching for it on the outside, you're already going down the wrong path.

Some women want you to need them so deeply and intrinsically, that you become dependant. Result #1: Now they have power. And something inside them instantly clicks on when they realize they have that "control," and they decide to make decisions from that point on based purely on what they have power to do. Respect, morality, friendship, all become low priority. Even the very sweet ones do this. I think it comes down to the primitive drives in human beings - fear (being the emotional component) and sex (which is the reason for greed/status/power struggles). All higher level decision making goes out the window.

Society has this propaganda that we all need to get married and have kids. I could forumulate some reasons for this, maybe it's because those half of marriages that last create stable tax bases and cleaner neigborhoods. The government has a more secure paycheck when you are hitched. hmm well off topic...

I've experienced the scenario of a woman getting EXACTLY what her heart has desired and what she's dreamed of for years, to simply take it all for granted and let it go. Let it go for something much less valuable, with far less happiness, and far more dysfunctional. In the end, they start seeking the same thing again - power. And when they found some f'r that is completely controlling (prevents them from having friends, going out, making something out of their lives) then she is stuck. That part of their brain that tries to get power over the male turns on full blast again, and overloads all other motivations. They stay in a relationship with the quote "jerk", because they can't succeed in gaining power. They cannot stop until that power is achieved.

What people do that? The ones that just can't have balance in their lives. They are never grounded, they swing from one extreme to another. It's impossible to have a long-term relationship without some degree of stability in your partner.

Unfortunately, I've realized a lot of us guys are attracted to instability and dysfunction, without even being aware of it.

2gnt: '99 RS-T, killed by a toyota, pending rebuild...
Daily: Volt
Daily #2: '99 EVG ebike- STOLEN by PEDRO