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The story: (Worth Reading imo)
Bored at work? I just wanted to tell everyone about my 22nd bday, it doesnt get interesting until the last 2 big paragraphs or so but I think its overall still a good story, and uc an view pics of the night on my myspace for those who care.....
Last Saturday (6/14/08) My sister told me she was going to take me out to dinner for my birthday and told me to let my friends know so I wouldn’t make plans with them. She told me to dress up and wear something nice and that we probably wouldn’t get back until around 2AM or so. She wouldn’t even tell me where we were going for dinner.
We pulled up to my favorite restaurant around 9PM, Claim Jumper (Thousand Oaks), so I was already pretty stoked; we walk in and head into the dining area. All of a sudden I thought I saw my friend Ben afar and I looked up and I start hearing a large chant and screams. I saw a huge group of my friends standing at the table and my mouth dropped and my face turned instantly red. I was so surprised because my friends and I already went out celebrating my birthday twice earlier in the week so I didn’t expect anything like this. (Wednesday 6/11 TGIF Simi Valley (w/ Evan Yale, Cadin (Eric), Brandon, David R, David W, John C, Courtney, Kari, Mark L, Doug, Evan R, Jeff A, and Jeff M) & (Thursday 6/12 BJ’s & Sunset Terrace In Westlake/Thousand Oaks w/ David R, David W, Kristi, and Kayla) But anyways I was so happy to see everyone I got to enjoy my favorite dish (Black Tie Pasta) w/ my favorite Drink (Absolut & Cranberry) w/ about 20 of my closest friends. (For those of you who feel left out, I’m sorry I know my sister and David R. tried to get everyone together for this event without making it too massive, and obviously they did not have contacts for everyone). It was nice hanging out with Ben & Lisa, and Julian & Chantee since we don’t get to hang out a lot outside of softball lol, Thanks again for the amazing card and gift card by the way! Also It was nice seeing Deanna which I haven’t seen in about a year or so. Some highlights at dinner: Evans & Doug’s amazing Blue Cheese Sandwich, David W’s head of lettuce salad, and Allison drinking her Rockstar & Vodka under the table =). Towards the end of dinner I was told we were going to go to a club in Agoura Hills called Chapter 8 which I have never heard of, but it seemed like everyone else had.
Its about 11:30PM or so and we all arrive at the club (some later than others but we all made it), I found out my sister ordered us Three Tables on the dance floor w/ 3 Bottle Services (2 Grey Goose Vodka & 1 Patron Silver) We all make our way into the club, and did we have to wait inline? Of course not, we be VIP, just say you are here with the party under “Natalie Kislig” and you were in. As we walked in they showed us our tables and removed the rope that was separating the dance floor and the booths. Also one thing I have to add, everyone, all my friends (guys and girls), looked amazing and all the girls looked absolutely gorgeous. At the club we had My sister Natalie, Deanna, Ben, Lisa, Julian, Chantee, David R, David W, Evan B, Allison, Brandon M, Cadin, Sandy, Amanda G, Ashley, John C, Jeff A, Mark L, Kayla, Kristi, Courtney, Doug, and of course myself. I did see Brandon T there for about 5 seconds and I think some more people did show up but I didn’t see them (will explain in a second). First thing that was somewhat upsetting is the fact that we were supposed to get three booths but we only got two, but we made the best of it. The first 2 bottles of Grey Goose were gone within the hour and we ended up ordering one more bottle of Vodka. Everyone was dancing including myself, I always need a drink or so before I can get the balls to go on the dance floor, and yes half the time I was sporting my stunna shades (well actually they were David W’s). I think my problem during the night was taking every shot or drink that someone handed me. I know I shouldn’t have taken those 6 or so Double Shots of Patron on top of the several Cran-Vodkas during dinner and at the club. So I’m assuming around 1AM in the morning I went to the bathroom and that was the last you saw of Todd Kislig for the night……….
I slowly open up my eyes look up (can only see out of one eye because my contact is dried up in the right one, until a couple of blinks later) I see the ceiling of the bathroom and I ask myself “What the fuck? I’m still in here?!” I get up from the ground and still thinking it is about 130AM or so. I peak my head out the door and not a single person is in the club, the only light that filled up the bar and dance floor was the daylight shining through! I reach in my pocket and look at my phone and it is 7:00AM. I have 8 text messages, 2 voicemails, and 55 missed calls. Aside from my throbbing headache all I can think about was how the fuck did this happen, I walked around the club a bit with the only sound was me dragging my feet over the polished tile. I walk up to the large glass pane doors but of course those things did not budge in the slightest. After roaming around what once was a loud, crowded, and bumpin party I stood still calmly called my sister in a quiet and desolate environment. My sister answered “Where are you?!” and I reply with “I’m Here!...I’m still at the club!...I ummmm I guess I passed out in the bathroom…” My sister was at my house in Simi Valley so she said she was on her way so I was expecting to wait about 30 mins or so. I continued stumbling around the lounge looking for a way out, and then I gazed upon the emergency exit door, and it also said will sound when opened along the door. My eyes glistened and I rushed to the door, It opened up freely and I was finally outside, then I looked back and thought to myself I did not here a peep from the door and realized this place did not even have an alarm. I walked out from the back alley and started walking in circles in the parking lot awaiting my sisters’ arrival. I noticed this Honda Accord circling the parking lot so every time it would get near me I would hide on the other side of the dumpster in the middle of the parking lot. I was still drunk, freaked out and freezing so I walked back to the back alley and tried opening doors (of course I could not get back into the club in which I was locked in 10 mins prior). Finally one of the doors opened up and I figured it was some different part of the club but it was some Financial Office/Group that was next door who carelessly leaves their emergency door open on the outside; I went straight for the bath room and looked myself in the mirror. My entire right side of my face is covered with dried up vomit, it was caked on and even though I soaked my head and face in the sink it still did not come off without some massive scrubbing with the neighboring paper towels. I finally somewhat clean up and start checking the place out, I noticed they were supplied with Dell Computer Towers in each cubicle, and had numerous HP 2600N Color Laser Printers (I only knew that from the worthless knowledge that I accumulated from Best Buy) and they also had a couple of flat panel tvs in their meeting rooms. After about 10 mins of walking around I found a nice comfy spot smack dab in the middle of the hard ground, the carpet was about 1/16 inches thick with concrete right below it, very comfy I might add. About 40 mins go by since I have called my sister, I then hear my phone ring and she tells me that she is here, I once again come out from the back alley with my nice slacks and grey wife beater on with my vomit soaked shirt (which I wore for the first time that night) swung over my right shoulder. I get in the car and I helplessly start shaking cuz I was cold and sweating at the same time. We were almost home on the 23 Freeway when we get pulled over by CHP for going 85MPH. My sister calmly and elegantly explained the situation as I’m shivering in the seat between my sister and the CHP officer peaking in on the passenger side. He asked for her license and registration and after about 5 minutes had her ticket ready to sign for. The heartless bastard still gave us a ticket. I get home around 830AM and pass out on my bed until around 1PM or so. I woke up and had a slight headache but really felt no hangover, well not as massive as I was expecting. I was soon greeted with massive text messages and calls from my friends telling me that they were glad that I’m ok, but also that I scared them have to death for leaving them, Obviously I had no intentions of passing out in the restroom, hell I don’t ever remember going to the bathroom, falling down on the right side of the toilet and vomiting on myself. So I do believe everyone knows I did not do this on purpose and was not trying to pull a stunt of any kind, I was simply….drunk, but I do remember everything up to that point in the bathroom. Great Night, I want to Thank all of my friends that showed up and my sister Natalie especially. That is my story.
Here are some highlights about the night that I missed and accumulated from various sources (Please correct me if I’m wrong, because word of mouth can get distorted down the line):
• Brandon felt it was necessary to get naked (well almost naked), after everyone was leaving Brandon noticed there was vomit all over his shirt and pants. Dried up vomit, so it must have been there for a good amount of time, because it was definitely not fresh. Brandon rode with David R in his Honda Accord Sedan, on the car ride home he felt it would be better to take off his clothes, so he took off his clothes except for his boxers and shoes, he then proceeded to through them out the window while on the freeway because they were tainted with someone’s else vomit… In the pants he threw out the window was his credit card, license and $40 Cash.
• Evan felt it was a good idea to try and pick up Sandy and Allison at the same time but he fell short and ummm dropped both girls on the ground.
• Doug was trying to dance with the club promoter all night and has about 5 photos with her.
• David R showed off his new dancing skills and dance move, it kind of like a spinning waddle?
• After nobody could find me for several hours Cadin came to the conclusion that I am most likely fine, If I was roaming the streets who was going to be messing with the one Mexican with a shaved walking the streets at 2AM, I could have obviously have a weapon of some sort on me and may use it willingly.
• David Whitlock was well accommodated with excess vomit on one leg and got some pee on his other leg. Both from two different sources which we will keep unnamed.
For those who wanna see pics....
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=4104467&albumId=1832190
Turbo8u - "I've never heard so many BOV's in my life at once..." (At So. Cali Meet-Up Sep. 25th)
Me - "I don't think I lost the love for my car, I think the cops took it..."
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