Personally what i do. I put the cross member in, not tight just in. i use the cross member to hold up the bellhousing while i use the jack to lower the drivers side of the trans. this tilts the top of the bellhousing to the drivers side so the flywheel can slide by. Just my preference and it works for me. You will find what works best for you.

I have had my motor out 3 times and that was the most comfortable way for my liking.

Terry