I apoligize if this a repost.



International Rules of Manhood

01: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella

02: It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances:
a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
c. After wrecking your boss' car.
d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
e. When she is using her teeth.

03: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

04: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

05: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her.

06: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However, complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

07: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional.

08: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

09: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never, ever ask who's playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless supermodel ..and it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
a. Yeah, Baby, Push it!
b. C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
c. Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e. Both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shall not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever



http://www.dsmregistry.com/detail.php?carid=1030

I think they need to add one more.

29. A man should never ask another man to get him a different size from the fitting room of a store!

A friend of mines did this to me a few years back and I told him to ask one of the girls in the fitting room. Just the thought of going to get him a different size of pants was gay as hell.

That's actually the list starting with number 03.

02. Never fuck with another man's car. Under any circumstances. (Just goes to show that theives and vandals are not men.)

And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

Originally posted by DR1665
And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

Huh?


http://www.dsmregistry.com/detail.php?carid=1030

Originally posted by xcasbonx

Originally posted by DR1665 And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

Huh? http://www.dsmregistry.com/detail.php?carid=1030

newwwwbie hey?

Originally posted by BumpinTalon
newwwwbie hey?

Say what? I'm seriously missing something here.


http://www.dsmregistry.com/detail.php?carid=1030

Originally posted by DR1665
That's actually the list starting with number 03. 02. Never fuck with another man's car. Under any circumstances. (Just goes to show that theives and vandals are not men.) And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

I didn't understand anything from you post DR1665. I guess it must be something personnal. :shrug

Originally posted by xcasbonx
04: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

05: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her.

I've broken these .. a bunch. I am less of a man because of this? Shit.

Originally posted by xcasbonx
24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.

This should be LAW.

Originally posted by xcasbonx
26: Thou shall not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

Damn!

"08: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest."

unless of course its your buddy's vehicle..and you threaten to piss all over the seats if they dont stop muhahahahah!

Originally posted by DR1665
And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

"Who is posting" == me.

Originally posted by DR1665

Originally posted by DR1665 And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

"Who is posting" == me.

wtf guys Ill say it

It is never ok to have any intimate contact with your "Best Friends" girl

Originally posted by DR1665

Originally posted by DR1665 And we can all read into what 01 might be, based on who is posting this, here.

"Who is posting" == me.

I think DR1665 was inhaling paint mixed with exhaust fumes today. :shrug Or he's just delirious cause he noticed he's broken all the rules of manhood. :+

Originally posted by xcasbonx
02: It is NEVER ok for a man to cry, EVER. Quit acting like a little bitch and suck that shit up.

fixed

WTF is wrong with lime green, orange, or sky blue. Some of the most aggressive, fastest, best handling mopars have been these colors!!!!!!



This is bullshit...who can i complain to?

Originally posted by Star Turbo Talon
WTF is wrong with lime green, orange, or sky blue. Some of the most aggressive, fastest, best handling mopars have been these colors!!!!!! This is bullshit...who can i complain to?

complain to me Terry, that pissed me off as much as you

Alright fuckers, I didn't make up these damn rules so I just got an email and decided to post them up on here when I was at work.

P.S. oh yeah I'm fuckin shitfaced right now.


http://www.dsmregistry.com/detail.php?carid=1030

Originally posted by xcasbonx
Alright fuckers, I didn't make up these damn rules so I just got an email and decided to post them up on here when I was at work. P.S. oh yeah I'm fuckin shitfaced right now. http://www.dsmregistry.com/detail.php?carid=1030

join m the colub!

yeah bishes!!!!!!! the drunk